The 7 books I recommend most to clients

I often find that things come up in client sessions that make me think about books I’ve read, podcasts I’ve listened to, or videos and TV shows I’ve watched that could help them through a particular problem. And there are some that I recommend a lot. 

So I thought I’d share with you the seven books I recommend to my clients the most. They make the list because they have been helpful to me personally in some way, and because clients say they get helpful things from them too.

The Self-Care Project by Jayne Hardy

I came across this book through following The Blurt Foundation online. Jayne Hardy was the founder

of this online mental health resource which she built after a long and debilitating battle with depression. 

If you struggle with the idea of self-care, this is one for you. It’s easy-to-read, whether you want to read it from cover to cover, or just dip into chapters that are most relevant to you right now. As well as helpful ideas and tips for improving your self-care, it's an interactive journal that's packed with fun little exercises to help you think about what you need to do to look after your mental health and wellbeing. You can read my review of this book in my blog.

Making Space: Creating boundaries in an ever-encroaching world by Jayne Hardy

Another brilliantly easy and helpful guide by Jayne Hardy, this time focusing on boundaries - helpful ones, ‘wonky’ ones, and how to create ones that work for you and protect you. Boundaries are such an important aspect of self-care, and this book helps you understand why honouring yours is important.

I like (and learn best) from books that include real-life experience, and Jayne shares lots of her own here, and of course, there are more interactive exercises to work on if that’s your thing.

Daring Greatly by Brene Brown and Rising Strong by Brene Brown

Honestly, I love almost everything Brene Brown has ever done and could list all of her books here!

I talk about many parts of her work with my clients often, because there is so much in her books that chime with so many people. Vulnerability…shame…boundaries…perfectionism…people-pleasing…procrastination… self-esteem…she has it all covered. And best of all, her work is based on years of real research with hundreds (maybe thousands) of people, so you can be confident that this is reliable self-help.

The Dance of Anger by Harriet Lerner

Every once in a while I read a book that really speaks to me. The Dance of Anger is one of those books and it's full of lightbulb moments about relationship dynamics and how to manage these.

Harriet uses case studies to illustrate how the various dynamics work - in families, partnerships, at work and with friends - and the ‘dances’ we do around boundaries in relationships.

This book is for you if you feel forever stuck in a conflict you can’t remove yourself from, or you struggle with difficult relationship dynamics. 

I couldn’t write a book recommendation list without adding my own, could it? (small cringe!) So here are my contributions to the world of self-care help.

Self-Care Tips for the Frazzled: Small steps to frazzle-free living by Antonia Higgins - free ebook

Self-care is something I bang on about all the time to anyone who will listen. It’s jumped on the buzzword bandwagon these days, which I think has diluted the importance of it in people’s minds. But it is so important for your health and wellbeing. 

Really, self-care is about doing what's best for you. It's about doing the small, everyday things that keep you mentally and physically healthy and well. It's fostering habits that take a little bit of stress out of your day, every day. This book compassionately points you in the right direction. 

Self-Care 101: a workbook for caring people who forget to care for themselves by Antonia Higgins

I wrote this workbook with caring people in mind. It’s an age-old problem. When you are a person

who cares about other people you often forget to extend that care to yourself. You work hard at making sure your people are ok, but often forget that you are a person who deserves your love and care too.

So if self-care is a new idea for you, you don't even know where to start thinking about self-care, or you feel you have 'lost yourself ' and would like to claim back some time and space for yourself, this workbook is for you. With lots of exercises to get you thinking about the basics of how to start putting some self-care on the agenda, it’s an easy and fun way to spend some time on yourself.

Sometimes finding the right message at the right time can make all the difference to your life, and there are so many helpful insights in these books that have helped me and my clients to change things and move forward. I hope you find something helpful in them too.

These books are just a starting point on the journey to more self compassion, self-kindness and valuing yourself. If you’re thinking about taking the next step and considering therapy, you can learn more about counselling with me here.

I hope you find these blogs interesting and helpful. If you’d like to read more of my musings you can subscribe to my blog and follow me on Facebook and Instagram

Contact me

Contact me at counselling@tranquillo.group to discuss how counselling might be helpful for you. I work face to face from my therapy room in Falkirk, and online.

If you'd like a copy of my free ebook - Self-care Tips for the Frazzled: Small steps to frazzle-free living' sign up to my mailing list and I'll share occasional news and updates with you.

Or get my workbook - Self-Care 101: a workbook for caring people who forget to care for themselves - here